Dealing with loss

Seen through the picture window of my brother's farmhouse early yesterday morning.
                            The cattle were already finding their breakfast of soft grasses --- you can see them in the distance there.      
Later as the day heated up, they found shade under the trees.  My sister-in-law gave me a great tour of the place, riding in their Kubota.  It was a beautiful morning!


        I have been visiting family and working out the legal details and practical decisions involved in the  passing of  our mother.  Quite a few hoops to jump through now!  It is so good to have a wonderful, if eccentric, family to share this with!

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Here is my mother in a photo with my daughter's children. It was taken Mothers Day of 2012.
I am so glad that we made the trip!

                       
                       It is a memory we will always cherish!

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         The photo really shows how a year makes a difference! The children have grown and flourished and Mom has passed to an even better place!

  Here are the "babies" today! ( well this month, anyway!)

        Sophie and Nina are in for a big adventure, going to Clayton, NM for a Thaxton family reunion....maybe they will need some little pink cowgirl boots????
  Can't wait to see them!  [and all my family!]

Where are my radishes?

 

These I painted a couple so years ago...love those pinky reds!

Now, I am trying to grow some.  Radish seeds are large seeds and usually sprout quickly, giving early spring gardeners a positive bit of encouragement!

So far, mine are not up, though they have had a couple of weeks of both cool and warm weather and plenty of rain too......I did see a squirrel creeping along the row where they are planted,  he was pausing and seemed to be nibbling on something?  I  am wondering.....?

The last day of Enchanting April brings hope!

These are the containers from last summer's failed and frustrating attempt to grow tomatoes.

So SAD! Gray and brown and weeds taking over already!

Today was glorious, and finally the time to make a change in the pots.....planning to do flowers this year...easier! Fewer fungus and insect problems!

So, off to the garden center.....fill the backseat of the car.....

 

...African daisies with purple centers, snapdragons, marigolds, lavender, basil, rosemary, tarragon.
Delightful!
I feel I am having a Rosemary and Thyme  sort of day!  Birdsong is all around!

Pull out the old plants and rubbish.....in with the new....(of course, I know that it is better to use fresh soil....but too hard to find a place of all of the soil in these pots and then $$$$$ to replace....).  Recycling is it is worth a try!

What kind of fertilizer do you like for your flowers and vegetables?

 

These flowers and plants will look great for at least a few days ( Our daughter Laura is coming from Georgia to see her grandmother.  Mom is in long term care and hospice is helping us now.) and the flowers and vegetables may even thrive and make my summer more joyful!

 

 We are expecting cool weather again in a few days....the snapdragons should like that!

 

I also  gambled on some vegetables, 4 cucumber plants, one "Merlot" sweet purple bell pepper, and one "old German" tomato.....we'll see!

 

Now, to read the booklet from hospice on the stages of dying.  Interesting, and. Like Rosemary Boxer and Laura Thyme, pour myself a glass of wine!

 

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I am also sewing when I have energy.  This is the string quilt with selvage strips on which I have been working!

 

 

Oh, and several knitting projects have come along too!  later a post on those!

 

Costumes in Mr. Selfridge

Aisling Loftus is the actress who plays Agnes Towler, one of my favorite characters in the BBC drama "Mr. Selfridge".

I love the costumes! Glamorous and opulent....but my heart was caught by one which only appears briefly, whenever shop girl Agnes is in her humble home!  It is her "pinny", the Edwardian apron in the print with roses.

I Googled  "Aisling Loftus images" until I found it!

 

And learned that the same costume had been used in an earlier production of "The Secret Garden"!

 

 

I'm glad that costumes are used more than once!

 

Now to sew some sweet floral dresses for my granddaughters, for spring!

 

 

 

April quilt show

 

We had our local guild quilt show 10 days ago.  It was fun!
Above a bright Lone Star quilt by Paula Mariedaughter, marks the edge of a display of many 8 pointed star quilts.....

 

Rustic doll beds and chairs were included!

 

This was my favorite crib quilt, by Adele Atha!

 

This is a fun quilt which I made and machine quilted.  Mother sewed on the binding before her stroke. Of course, that makes it special to me now!

 

[I have several more photos of my quilts....but I swear, Windows 8 photo gallery is hiding them!  I can find and edit them in the gallery, but when I go to upload them, they won't appear.

 

Back later IF I can find where they are!!!!]

 

 

 

 SUCCESS, after a nap, they seem to be here.....LOL!

Above, sold to my good friend Lizzie, is "Victory Garden", based on the British flag.  The quilt pattern by that name can be found and purchased here !

 

This applique quilt from "Piece O Cake" designs was a block of the month from 1994. The setting with the colorful diamonds and prairie point edge are my ideas. This is hand applique and hand quilted by myself!

 

Here is a small quilt with many pieces, The Fonthill Quilt is a pattern from Kaffe Fassett. It is machine pieced and hand-quilted by me!

 

Mostly solids, this is a contemporary quilt which I machine pieced using improvisational techniques...that is chunk it together and cut down to the correct block size! Machine pieced and machine quilted ( with colorful bright variegated thread and lots of points-in the lattice- and circles-on the blocks!)

The Seamstress

A painting reflecting how I spend some of my time ["The Seamstress" by Stanley Reed, 1941.  From Karen's lovely blog!] This period painting reminds me of the current "Call the Midwife" show. I love seeing the antique (now) sewing machine too!

Here are the twin granddaughters wearing the Easter dresses which I sewed for them and delivered in person last month! Nina Kate and Sophie Jane on Easter morning!

However, sewing and quilting aside.....right now it is time for real spring cleaning, as I have out-of-state family coming this weekend. Not only cleaning, but toddler-proofing! Grandson Wes (below) is coming! Whoo-pee!

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I have not been blogging as often as I once did!  We have had many things going on, mostly Mom not bouncing back (at almost 90 this year, it is understandable) and now in long term care. Much time has been spent going through boxes looking for significant, important papers, and finding ways to fund the long term care...($6,000/month).
I hope she will recognize some of the family who are coming to see her this weekend!  They included her latest great grandson, my grandnephew, Mark, who was born on March 7!  I can't wait to meet him!

Here is Mark in his mother's arms just before his baptism!

Signs of Spring

 

 

The wreath I made for the front door (lots of searching for just the right eggs!)

 

Daffodils blooming all over town now!

 

 

 

The late afternoon sun (daylight savings time) filtering through daffodils and hyacinths in a corner of the garden!

 

Vinca (periwinkle) ground cover blooming in shady areas.

 

Soon I'll be seeing springtime at my daughter's (maybe her cherry tree will be a froth of pink blossoms?).  Seeing the family will be wonderful!

 

 

This big sister is delightful.....as is

 

her funny little brother.... who is a Big brother now.....

 

to these smiling toddlers! (thanks to my daughter for all these photos!)

 

 

I just finished sewing some Liberty cotton dresses for the twins, size 2!

The fabric was purchased by their great aunt in a shop in Montmarte. So soft and wonderful to sew!

I had enough to make matching bloomers for each as well....!

 

Time to pack and catch that early flight tomorrow!

The earth is calling.....

 

It is chilly outside today and that is a good thing!

I could have done this a month ago, but today it finally was time! 

 

 I cleaned out the old lasagna garden!

Raking the surface after pulling out last fall's dried plants, I saw several earthworms! Wonderful!

 

 

I planted two cool weather plants (which is why I said I could have done this a month ago!). Cilantro and "Rocky Top Lettuce Mix" from Baker Creek Heirloom Seeds . I have grown this lettuce for several springs and just love it! It has 6 varieties of leaf lettuce and probably a thousand seeds in the packet. [Not wanting to thin so many baby plants later this year, I sowed the seed more sparingly.  It has been very reliable to sprout and grow almost 100%!]

 

There is always such hope in getting out into the garden this time of year! Nothing too difficult about sowing a few seeds, raking lightly, sprinkling softly with the gentle hose and then returning to reading the library book which was due yesterday....!

 

Returning it will be one of the errands later today! 

 

Cornish Frock is knitted and washed!

Washed, folded and ready to wear this spring!
 

I first wrote about this project here .

At that time, it was the first day of autumn in 2011.  Now as spring nears in 2013, I have finished the knitting!
It feels so good to have done this one! Much of it was in the last month while visiting Mom in rehab.
Yesterday , I stitched the pieces together, without blocking for once, measured and photographed the garment. See the first photo.  It was medium blue (as were my bamboo needles from all this indigo!) and 29 inches long.

 

Into the washer (with a regular dark load) it went.....and then the dryer.  What suspense! I went out to visit Mom and then made our dinner while it was in the dryer. (Steve was home, I didn't leave the dryer going  unsupervised!)

Ta-da!  It came out as it should, about 10 %  shorter all over.  I didn't measure the width....but it fits me quite nicely now....even if it also shrank horizontally....mostly though, it was a lengthwise shrink.
These garments traditionally have shortish sleeves, as the men at sea didn't need long armed sweaters weighting them down in their work!

It will continue to fade like denim jeans....and I don't plan anymore hot water washings....just to be sure...it will have cold baths. No more shrinking, we hope!
Thanks to Jane Gottelier  and the knitters of Cornwall traditions for a great pattern!

Another knitter's story. about knitting his Cornish frock....good information!

Changes and letting go of expectations, One day at a time!

I took the beautiful amaryllis, which now had 10 BLOOMS!, to the center where Mom is for rehab.  It was so cheerful in one of the open areas!

Now, the red amaryllis has become droopy and I have it back at home....it does have a new stalk with 4 new buds! Unstoppable for the moment! [ and because of constant weird effects of changes with Windows 8, this photo, below, will not open for editing....more letting go of expectations...I had wanted a vertical photo!]

So, let it be.....sideways! But you get the idea, growth and change...blooming and dying! And I can't control everything!!!!!

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Now to the other part of the story, my mother ( who has been living with us for 3 years) has had a stroke. She is in a nice rehab facility.  Last Sunday I baked her favorite chocolate chip cookies for a treat when I went to see her on Monday.

Monday morning came and before I was up and out the door, I got a call from her rehab nurse saying that she was slurring her words and a few other things so they were sending her to the emergency room to be checked.

I grabbed my treat for her...the box of cookies.....BUT....duh....of  course, when one has a stroke affecting the tongue and speech, it also affects chewing and swallowing.  No more cookies for Mom!

Now all her foods have to be soft and liquids have to be thicker...

We got her a fine wheelchair, one that can recline to different angles when she is sitting for long periods. Here my brother, Hollis and I are taking her for a ride in her wheel chair and touring the halls of the place where she is living.

So we take it one day at a time now, Mom is sweet and thankful for the good care her nurses and CNA's provide. Some days she is up and in the chair, some days having to rest more....

Absolutely Fabulous!

 

A show stopper amaryllis! Our friend, Sally, brought a bulb and a pot for us about 6 weeks ago. 

 

 

 She planted it with TLC and left it with us.....it was a slow start....but look at it now!!!

 

[the one now in the background was a Christmas gift and has just finished a show of it's own!]

 

Thank-you, Sally!

It's snowing today....

 

....but Sunday was beautiful!

 It was our 40th wedding anniversary.  We drove to the town where we had gone for our honeymoon and walked up and down the streets for several hours...more about that once the photos from Mr. P's iPhone are available....

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Meanwhile, out in Oklahoma, a ewe had twin lambs and rejected one.  Our niece, Natalie, who is about to have her own little lamb, had to start mothering a little early!
The lamb is doing well and thinks she is his mother now! We think she is going to be a wonderful mom!

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These I am posting because I love blue and white stripes at times!  If I could just get my photos organized and uploaded in a good way, then I might do a post about that!...

 

 

More stripes later and more anniversary photos, too!

 

 

 

This artwork is by Loretta Marvel of Pomegranates and Paper.  Loretta loves blue and blue stripes too!

 

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Now to curl up on this snowy day with a good book....I picked up The Unlikely Pilgrimage of Harold Fry, at our library just now, ran to the grocery store as the flakes started to fall and then stopped at the rehab center where Mom is to take her some treats! (black cherry yogurt is a favorite with her)

More about stitching....

“To sew is to pray. Men don't understand this. They see the whole but they don't see the stitches. They don't see the speech of the creator in the work of the needle. We mend. We women turn things inside out and set things right. We salvage what we can of human garments and piece the rest into blankets. Sometimes our stitches stutter and slow. Only a woman's eyes can tell. Other times, the tension in the stitches might be too tight because of tears, but only we know what emotion went into the making. Only women can hear the prayer.” ---Louise Erdrich

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Hand sewing or machine sewing, both are centering and sometimes meditative. When things are going well and you aren't having to rip out a lot, sewing can help lower blood pressure!
In spite of what Louise Erdrich says,  I think there are men who understand that too!

 

These photos are of my mother recently stitching.  She loves doing it, and finds it harder with advancing age.....yesterday she had a set back, a stroke brought on by not drinking enough water.....so, remember to "sip as you stitch".....and not on alcoholic beverages!